Valentines Day - I'm Jaded, What Do You Want From Me?

Okay. So it's been a while, but since V-day is coming up soon, I just had to write about it.

In short, I love the idea of Valentine's Day, that is, as a day dedicated to appreciating your lover. But beyond that I feel like V-Day pretty much spirals downward from there into a big pile of shit. I just hate the way it's commercialized into something that becomes more of an advertised form of "romance," where the only acceptable gifts on V-day become roses, diamonds, chocolate and stuffed garbage. Not that any of these things are inherently bad gifts, just ones that are so generic and pathetically thoughtless that getting them is almost an insult saying, "Hey, I didn't really bother to know you that well or any of your interests beyond what commercials tell me, so here's a generic romantic present! Aren't I thoughtful?"

Well, sorry buddy, I'd disagree that you're thoughtful. A step up from forgetting it completely, but then again if you forgot, you're probably undateable anyway.

My mom always rips on me for not appreciating the standard "romantic" gifts and fare. Says I'm not sentimental. I say we just have different definitions of sentimental.

Maybe I'm so cynical and bitchy about this because I've only had one official V-day with a partner, and that was a pretty bad experience to begin with. Basically we didn't even celebrate on V-Day because he wasn't in town, but we "celebrated" the next night. "Celebrating," meaning we went to the local pub where his friends were watching some sports game where he proceeded to get wasted while I watched for an hour. Then I pretended to like having sex with him when we got back to his house (and he was still drunk, I sure know how to pick 'em!). At least he had the sense to get me a book instead of chocolate.

I would say that the worst of the pathetic presents would have to be stuffed bears...





Wait, WHAT? One, why are these women all really hot, busty and look like they're more likely to suck a dick than work in an office? (I'm only saying that because of the overly sexualized way they act and talk. I am in no way against sucking a dick.) Two, why are they all orgasming and screaming about a bear and how their guy is going to be soooo lucky tonight!? So when the scary guy in the back of the office is licking his lips (@1:16) over a fantasy that this bear is SOOOO getting him laid tonight, I'll just cry myself to sleep knowing that this ad probably worked on someone like him. Not only was that commercial really creepy and sexist, who the hell wants a stuffed bear??? And it was fucking $70! Are you kidding me? What does anyone even DO with a stuffed animal who's over 10 years old?




Ladies, guys, if you like those kinds of presents, then more power to you. I just think that it's lazy and generic.

Rant off.